18 11 / 2011
I Only Needed One Thing…
Written by BROOKE
This is what I should have done…
I try at all costs to avoid the grocery store with my kids. I frequent the grocery store late at night, when only the limpest broccoli is left and the 2/1 oatmeal boxes are all gone. I usually find myself parked next to another minivan and often run into other friends trying to get their kidless shopping done.
I love it. I love walking those dimly lit aisles all by myself. The 80’s musak playing in the background. Just me and my cart and all the time in the world, I even sing along some nights. I’ve actually had my husband text me to ask if I was ok after spending over an hour at the store.
But the other day when I ran through my mental dinner checklist I realized something. I had forgotten to buy the peppers to make stuffed peppers. Turns out, it’s pretty hard to make stuffed peppers without them. So, I thought, no big deal, I can just stop in at the grocery store after we meet our friends for lunch. No biggie.
We met our friends for lunch which led us dangerously close to nap time. “It’s ok,” I thought, “I only need one thing!”
So we ran into the store. Instead of my usual bring kids on an errand arsenal (iphone, snacks, sippy cups, board books). I just grabbed the kids and my wallet. No cart, after all, I only needed one thing!
We ran in. Tantrum #1— we didn’t get a TV cart. Have you seen these things, a shopping cart with a car on the front and a TV inside? They are great. If you get one. We did not. “WE ONLY NEED ONE THING!!” I screamed (I mean calmly explained). We don’t need a cart!
I grabbed the peppers. But since we were there… just a few more things. Keep in mind I’m carrying the baby. Some grapes (they were on sale!). And maybe one or five other things. I mean, we were going to be fast.
Zach is screaming. Still not over the TV cart. We’re going to be fast, I promise. We’re almost done! We run/drag/scream our way to the checkout. A line. GREAT. Just what I need. A line!
Then I spot it. Self check out. Do I dare? But there they are all inviting and open and FAST looking. “Come on Zach, mommy needs your help.” I coax in my sweetest I’m-a-good-mom voice. At this point he gets excited. This thing looks fun. I let him hold something. He tries to climb up in the bagging area. The machine starts yelling at me “Unexpected item in bagging area. Please remove.”
“GET DOWN!” I screamed. I was losing it. We were deteriorating. Brady is doing that boneless flop to get out of my arms. I’m dropping grapes. My pits are starting to sweat. The machine is still yelling at me. WHY DIDN’T I GET A CART!?
Zach is hysterical. He wants to be up on the machine. He won’t get down. I’m dragging him down. I’m dropping Brady. People are literally stopping in their tracks and staring. I’m trying to act nice. I’m nice, I swear. But we just need to get this ONE THING!
Zach is now LAYING on the grocery store floor. I have scanned my club card and I’m trying desperately to scan my other items. Brady is running out the door. I run after him leaving screaming Zach and my purse behind. Finally the self checkout helper comes over. She scans all of my items for me, takes my cash from me and feeds it into the machine, bags my groceries and gives me that sympathetic look that only another mother could give.
I put my bag over my arm, pick up Brady around the waist, grab Zach by the hand while he continues to scream bloody murder and get the heck out of there. And, as I see it, lessons learned. Always get a cart. Even if you only need ONE THING!
